Real Reality


We are approaching the final month for the year 2014. As such, we will conclude this year in a month time (at the time of this writing). For the past eleven months, what are our progress, particularly in various domain of life – work, spiritual, family and friends, relationship?

At the beginning of the year, we usually will craft some basic plan on what to achieve. Some of you might go deep and write a very comprehensive plan. Nevertheless, planning is easy to do, just jot whatever we tend to have next year and place the hope that we will get those without much hiccups.

Life is not that easy, everyone knows this. Perfection and idealist is what we wish, but the reality is bitter than sweet. During planning stage, we put certain assumption and these assumptions are idealist in nature – not counting factors that are beyond our control. Act of God you may suggest, but I think is merely our own act that will constitute what will happen.

Everyone has his or her own perception, or reality on people, situation or material. Perception is unique for each of us – exact similarity is very rare if none at all. Issues will prevail when someone perception ‘clash’ with others and create what we label as ‘conflict’. Conflict, misunderstanding, accusations are just clash of perception (plus facts and figures).

It is almost impossible to avoid clash in our life, regardless in which domain (work, relationship, etc.), just the severity differ depending on situation. Clash is not good, it might work in good faith to unleash whatever or whichever bad feeling we have, but in long term, in will cultivate stress, displeasure, inaccurate perception. Bad feeling, in my opinion, is just a corrupted process in our mind and it will get into normal sooner or later. But, if decision is made during bad feeling, the consequence might be disasterous.

Regardless, all of it starts with perception. To have a positive perception, we have to know, to understand, to transpire the ‘real reality’ and not reality that we get from others. Others’ might have distorted reality and using that as our guidance will not make us better, but rather more distorted and disoriented.

How to get the ‘real reality’? The keyword is to listen, without prejudice, on what others want to say, to convey. Don’t simply draw into conclusion on half-baked facts, or others’ opinions. Listening is a very powerful tools, let he or she say with full heart. Then you will feel the ‘real reality’ not only on his/her part, but also inside yourself.

We live in reality, but reality is not really real. Real is conceal.


Author: Audi Faliq Ibrahim

Executive at Yayasan Basmi Kemiskinan. Alumni of International Islamic University Malaysia. An old soul and #INTJ.

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